Tuesday, 05 August, 2003

We continue a brief walk with some material on reconciliation by Walter Wink.



…there are gross misunderstandings about forgiveness that block the path to reconciliation. One is the old adage, “Forgive and forget.” How this perverse piece of advice ever gained currency is beyond understanding. No one can consciously “forget” anything. The very attempt to “forget” something places it in the center of conscious attention. We should never try to forget our life’s most painful experiences anyway. Forgiveness is offered with full knowledge of the offense. We must never forget the ways we have hurt others, lest we pretend to be better than we are, and we must never forget the ways others have hurt us, if for no other reason that to protect ourselves against its repetition.



I have always found this advice, “Forgive and forget,” to be quite odd and mostly unhelpful so I was glad Wink brought it up for us. I know that I have said “I forgive you” to people and yet I know that I did not forget the offense. In fact, I know that when I do “not forget it” I then feel guilty for remembering it…as though I really didn’t forgive. But as Wink notes, we must never forget the ways we have hurt others or the ways others have hurt us. It is in the midst of our pain and the work of reconciliation and forgiveness that we begin to see the power and dynamics of God’s Reign. Here in the reality of our wounds, we are invited to recall the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus. Forgiveness and new life for all…in all situations! We are invited into that circle of life knowing that we are acting contrary to the world and contrary to how we ourselves would like to act.



Connection: We walk into this day simultaneously carrying the hopes for the day and baggage from yesterday and the Good News. The Good News is the power to keep our whole lives with us and to see them in a new light. That new light is what begins to change this day into one of hopefulness.



As you walk with us Lord, be our light within the shadows of our lives when we can so easily lose sight of the wealth of your forgiveness that you offer to us as power for living and loving with those around us. Amen.