The lead piece is from "Amazing Grace by Kathleen Norris. In this book she takes many of the words and images of the faith and attempts to put some reality and life to them.
BELIEF, DOUBT, AND SACRED AMBIGUITY
Praise of God is the entire reason for worship. It is the opposite of self-consciousness. But when a person is struggling mightily with conversion, anguishing over issues of belief and doubt, worship can become impossible... Remembering helped; it helped enormously. Believing in God, listening to Bible stories, and especially singing in church on Sunday mornings had been among the greatest joys of my childhood. And when I would remember that, a modicum of faith would enter my heart, a conviction that the God who had given me all of that would be likely to do so again. But if I had to find one word to describe how belief came to take hold in me, it would "repetition." Repetition as Kierkegaard understood it, as "the daily bread of life that satisfies with benediction."... Over time, it was the ordinary events of life itself, coming "in between" the refrain of the church service, with it familiar creeds, hymns psalms, and scripture stories, that most developed my religious faith. Worship summed it up and held it together, and it all came to seem like a ballade to me, one that I was living.
Many time I hear myself telling people that it is the "you of me" that enables me to put some devotion and power in my life. All that means is that it is so very easy for me to doubt and to be overcome by anxiety. It is as you tell me stories...it is as you act out in ways that are faithful and strong...it is as you remind me of the power of our God within all the everyday aspects of our lives that I find something onto which I can grab and hold...and keep holding. These simple devotions have been for me an example of that. Two years ago, on June 1, I finally started these daily devotions. I needed it. I needed to stay focused. I needed to enter into a "repetition" that would provide a place to stand and move and venture out into my day. You...you...have given me that opportunity. Remembering that the faithful of God are legion and are standing ready like a line of protestors who will not let the power of the day continue to brutalize the world, allows me moments of belief in the midst of my doubts.
Connection: What is it that you need to remember that will keep you focused on the way of our Lord among us? What are those repetitive acts within your day that you already are taking seriously or what are the ones you would like to initiate? Then again, what kind of help would you like or need along the way?
Lord of the Living Story of Faith, you promise to abide with us and you do. Sometimes we are not able to see you within the many roadways we wander through this day and yet we know...we know from the stories we remember...that you are indeed at our side and calling us into the fullness of your blessed Reign. Amen
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