1 July 2005

The week draws to a close with another piece on marriage from 1 Corinthians.

To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is well for them to remain unmarried as I am. But if they are not practicing self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to be aflame with passion.
To the married I give this command - not I but the Lord - that the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does separate, let her remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not divorce his wife. (1 Cor. 7:8-11)

First note that someone "aflame with passion" does not mean that they are acting on their passions. A person may be celibate and yet always consumed by the desire to be with another person. In writing this, even though Paul is speaking of a man and a woman, I simply wondered about someone who is a gay or lesbian as we understand them today. Wouldn't it be best for them to be in a life-long relationship than to burn with passion in a celibate state or a married state because they felt the social pressure to do that? It is not one of Paul's concerns here...but I do think that if we are to take Paul's teaching seriously, we may have to take it seriously within the realm of life as we see it today. On the matter of divorce, Paul opens up the possibility for a woman to leave her husband - something unheard of...and yet it seems that it was actually done, or else he wouldn't mention it here. Is he now speaking to this Corinthian context rather than following the teaching of Jesus on divorce? He doesn't go into the issue as strongly as Jesus does in Mark's gospel, for example. Today, it seems as though it is nothing to be divorced or get a divorce - bam...its done. But to be quite honest, a broken relationship that was meant to be life-long, even if there is a divorce for good reason, is a trauma to the individual and the community of the church. Remember, Paul is not writing to a person; he is writing to the community. His concern is pastoral. Yes, it would be good if we could work through our differences...but reality says, that can be next to impossible. So, how do we go forward from here? The Church is still dealing with this one.

Connection: How does the community of the church care for those who have gone through divorce? How do we help one another go on to live a new life...forgive the other...forgive ourselves...and then, start up into a new life in which the old does not rule us anymore?

We are a broken people and at times our brokenness damages the relationship that our most central to our lives. Lord of New Life, we give you thanks for you not only stand alongside us in our brokenness, you walk with us, and then you mercifully offer us new lives that we can grasp hold of and begin to dance a new dance and still remain in your blessed embrace. Amen.